We move but we never move in isolation. Most of us, nay, mostly all of us move with a lot of baggage. We have moved out of our little cribs at home, to university, on to a job, to various relationships carrying all that baggage (physical or emotional) with us all the way. It’s a miracle we can even move an inch forward as the weight bears down on our being.
The picture that comes to my mind is that of a beast of burden. They have been created to carry weight, but that weight is not life long. The baggage is constructive, transitional and for a reason, which is to assist man to transport in an efficient manner. What is our explanation to keep chipping at that chip on our shoulder and preserving all that debris for posterity sake?
To let go can be the most difficult 3 words to actually implement in ones life. Easier said than done, but isn’t it high time to actually sit down with a piece of paper and jot down in caps…”IS IT WORTH IT”?
Different theories of forgive and forget, human kindness, benefit of doubt etc. soften the blow, yes; but as we move forward covering up the pain and grief of broken relationships, failure, angst, anger and regret we push ourselves into a labyrinth so deep, that to get out of it could well be an impossible task!
Pretty gilded chains of mementos, associative memories, revised-repeated-endless looped justifications of why and when and because are to put simply-USELESS and POINTLESS. In the end the only person one hurts is oneself. The negativity one carries reflects and screams – Look at me, I am crashing and taking you down with me! God knows people would run away from those signals faster than Usman Bolt!
It hurts, and each memory gnaws at that pain afresh but one needs to gather strength and say-Mate, you just gots to go.
The chains will not fall down dramatically, but at least the hold will loosen. So if it requires deleting some emails, pictures, blocking some people on Facebook, giving away old clothes one will never wear ( because one cannot simply loose all that weight in one go and bellbottoms really have had their time!) or doing something new, So be it! Why not? It is difficult enough to realize how to deal with ones issues in a constructive manner without having to worry about what people would think of any dramatic change! Spring cleaning isn’t only for the wardrobe, it’s for ones life. Ones Ubuntu.
Some factors in ones life just have to go. One needs to be subjectively selfish in order to grow. As I told one of my pseudo work people “Your negativity is affecting my productivity”. Makes perfect sense to my mind, as his antics were stressing me thereby affecting my interaction with my peers and the energy around me , and that’s baggage I don’t want. Apparently this direct approach works. Why faff about giving excuses, being politically correct and not fooling anyone. If you have decided to push that factor out of your life, might as well cut all cords.
We as evolving apes are not meant to be beasts of burden. Our bodies and psyche are not meant to deal with undue pressure. There is a reason why there are so many high paid people studying the mess up of the brain. Rather than making a conscious effort of repressing everything, one ought to make a conscious effort to find any positive way and mean to keep oneself happy, to invigorate each day. We owe it to ourselves, to treat ourselves to a slice of happiness, no matter if it’s about scoring a lousy score at bowling with some delightful people and still winning, yay! Or cheering a colleague up and making her smile.
We do what we have to do, to make sense of who we are.
Erykah Badu says it bestJ